Book Review: Star Wars: The Force Unleahsed II SPOILERS!

In 2010, W. Haden Blackman returned to LucasArts with another shitty script for a four-hour game called The Force Unleashed II. Galen's not dead, he's been cloned trillions of times, and he seeks Juno. Synopsis: The dark side could not seduce him (like it even tried), the Empire could not control him (like they even tried), death could not defeat him (which is BS, by the way). And now, nothing can stop him from seizing his destiny (what, to have the worse cliffhanger in the history of cliffhangers? There's not even going to be  a TFU3). As ruthless apprentice to Darth Vader, Starkiller was mercilessly schooled in the ways of the dark side, commanded to exterminate the last of the purged Jedi Order, and groomed for the ultimate Sith power play: assassination of the Emperor. He served without question, killed without remorse, and lost his heart without warning to beautiful Imperial fighter pilot Juno Eclipse, never suspecting that he was just a tool in the schemes of his masters—until it was too late to escape their lethal betrayal. Juno mourned Starkiller as dead . . . but now he is back, purged of all memories and programmed to kill. And as fate brings Juno and Starkiller closer to reuniting, with Darth Vader determined not to lose his assassin a second time, they will both have to make a stand. The prize is freedom. The punishment for failing will be eternal enslavement to the dark side of the Force . . . .

The novel opens with Juno Eclipse, now part of the Rebellion, on Salvation, watching as the raid over Cato Neimoidia happens, and she warns Rahm Kota to stay out of trouble and that the Rebellion can't officially sanction his actions. Juno helps Bail, Leia, Mon Mothma, and Garm Bel Iblis by agreeing to lead a team to help take Dac from the Empire. This goes well, even with Ackbar appearing, but Imperial forces manage to chase them off. (By the way, this all takes place two months before Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope.) Starkiller, the insane clone of Galen Marek, awakens to a training room, but he doesn't know who he is and destroys the cloning facility on Kamino to cover his escape. He ends up on Cato Neimoidia where he frees Kota from captivity and they flee in the Rogue Shadow. PROXY is there as well, having been retrieved and repaired since the events on Corellia. Kota tells him that the Rebellion needs him, but Starkiller doesn't agree. Meanwhile, Juno's trying to get back to the fleet, and finally manages to succeed in some of the best Rebellion scenes in the book, or would be if she didn't keep harping about how great and holy and noble Galen is. Starkiller has a ridiculously stupid meeting with Yoda on Dagobah. Starkiller, Kota, and PROXY arrive at the main fleet to find it under attack in the Itani Nebula. He also notes that his family's symbol is everywhere. Boba Fett leads the Imperial Forces and they manage to steal Juno before Starkiller can get them. Starkiller leads the Rebellion to Kamino to destroy the cloning facility there. Once there, the Rebellion bombards the facility while Starkiller fights his way to Vader and finds Juno dead. Starkiller defeats Vader, then revives Juno spares Vader's life and the Rebellion takes him hostage, but Boba Fett follows the Rogue Shadow in the Slave I.

And that's how it ends. Seriously. No afterthought or mention of how Vader gets free, or what happens to Starkiller, Juno, PROXY, Kota, and the storyline. It just ends badly. Oh, and throughout it all, both Juno and Starkiller declare their love for each other, which is still weird considering they only knew each other for a month and aren't together until the end in this bit. And that stupid placing of this book almost before A New Hope. How does that make sense? When Luke goes around, looking for Jedi training between ANH and ESB, why does no one remember Kota or Starkiller? Were they embarrassments to the Rebellion? See, these are the sort of questions W. Haden Blackman and Sean Williams ignored in favor of a crap story, like Troy Denning in the post NJO section of the Expanded Universe. Anyway, rant over. 

Up next, Mass Effect: Revelation by Drew Karpyshyn, which isn't a revelation at all, more like a bland one-dimensional story with one-dimensional characters.

Book Review: Star Wars: The Force Unleashed SPOILERS!

In 2008, LucasArts released a game taht most fans claim is the penultimate of garbage, an eight hour game called The Force Unleashed, which really doesn't allow the player to use every aspect of the magical Force, but rather limits the Force powers to about eight or ten. Synopsis: "The Sith always betray one another....I'm sure you'll learn that soon enough." The overthrow of the Republic is complete. The Separatist forces have been smashed, the Jedi Council nearly decimated, and the rest of the Order all but destroyed. Now absolute power rests in the iron fist of Darth Sidious–the cunning Sith Lord better known as the former Senator, now Emperor, Palpatine. But more remains to be done. Pockets of resistance in the galaxy must still be defeated and missing Jedi accounted for...and dealt with. These crucial tasks fall to the Emperor’s ruthless enforcer, Darth Vader. In turn, the Dark Lord has groomed a lethal apprentice entrusted with a top-secret mission: to comb the galaxy and dispatch the last of his masters’ enemies, thereby punctuating the dark side’s victory with the Jedi’s doom. Since childhood, Vader's nameless agent has known only the cold, mercenary creed of the Sith. His past is a void; his present, the carrying out of his deadly orders. But his future beckons like a glistening black jewel with the ultimate promise: to stand beside the only father he has ever known, with the galaxy at their feet. It is a destiny he can realize only by rising to the greatest challenge of his discipleship: destroying Emperor Palpatine. The apprentice’s journeys will take him across the far reaches of the galaxy, from the Wookiee homeworld of Kashyyyk to the junkyard planet of Raxus Prime. On these missions, the young Sith Acolyte will forge an unlikely alliance with a ruined Jedi Master seeking redemption and wrestle with forbidden feelings for his beautiful comrade, Juno Eclipse. And he will be tested as never before–by shattering revelations that strike at the very heart of all he believes and stir within him long-forgotten hopes of reclaiming his name...and changing his destiny.

This is by far the worst novelization of any game I've ever ready. Sean Williams can't write properly and just copies down what happens on the screen for the first act before he decides to try and do anything to enhance the story, but by then it's too little too late. 

The novel opens with Darth Vader ordering the Secret Apprentice/Starkiller/Galen Marek to kill former Jedi General and Jedi Master Rahm Kota, but once Starkiller gets to the orbital station above Nar Shaddaa, Kota has already set traps for him. Starkiller and Kota duel briefly, and Kota, damaged and blind, tells him that Vader will kill him and that he (Kota) will be part of Starkiller's future. Starkiller shoves Kota out of the station and brings his lightsaber back to Vader as proof that he killed the renegade Jedi. Vader then tasks Starkiller with killing insane two-bit Jedi Kazdan Paratus on the junkyard world of Raxus Prime, which Starkiller does, but this time actually killing his target. Another mission pits him against Jedi Master "Shaak Ti" on Felucia. (I say that because most fans like to believe this character is really Ahsoka Tano from the shitty Star Wars: The Clone Wars kiddy show around that time.) "Shaak Ti" has an apprentice named Maris Brood, who escapes before Starkiller kills "Shaak Ti," but "Shaak Ti" kills herself after telling Starkiller that both Vader and the Emperor will kill him and that there's no hope for him. It's during these missions that we're introduced to Juno Eclipse, Starkiller's pilot and obvious love interest--this this bit still comes out of nowhere in both novel, comic, and game formats, like they're not even trying. She spends the majority of the book brooding over being ordered to bomb her own homeworld by Vader. Once Starkiller rejoins with Vader, Palpatine shows up and orders Vader to kill him. Vader does so, then retrieves the body and orders Starkiller's crazy droid PROXY to have Starkiller found a rebellion to help him overthrow the Empire.

Starkiller retrieves PROXY and Juno and sets about to complete his mission. He goes to Cloud City, Bespin and gets Kota to side with him, despite Kota's protests. Then they head to Kashyyyk, where Starkiller runs into Leia and R2-D2, before setting the Wookiees free and destroying the shipyards. It's there that Starkiller learns of his parents being killed by Vader during the Occupation of Kashyyyk and that his dad was a Jedi Master named Kento Marek. He also learns that his name is Galen Marek. They head back to Felucia and Galen defeats Maris and saves Bail Organa. Organa wants proof that Galen is a Jedi and that he can defeat the Emperor and Vader; Vader suggests via PROXY that Galen should hit the shipyards above Raxus Prime. Back they go and Galen kills many Imperials just to destroy the orbital docks. PROXY tries to fulfill his mission to kill Galen, but Galen defeats him. Then everyone heads to Corellia where Bail Organa, Mon Mothma, Leia, and Garm Bel Iblis agree to start a rebellion and to make war, but they're interrupted by Vader and the 501st. Vader and Galen duel, but Vader wins and almost kills Galen when PROXY intervenes as Obi-Wan Kenobi and they fight. Vader kills PROXY and watches Galen fall to his death. Miraculously, Galen survives and, with Juno, tracks Vader to the Horuz system, to the planet of Despayre, to the Death Star. Galen leaves, but not before Juno delcairs her love for him (which comes out of nowhere) and Galen slaughters his way through the Death Star, frees Bail, Mon, Garm, and Kota, then duels Vader. Vader wins, but Galen destroys the room they're in and kills himself. Palpatine and Vader take his body while, on Corellia, Bail, Mon, Leia, Kota, and Juno form the Alliance to Restore the Republic using the Marek family crest as their symbol.

The ending fight on the Death Star, in the Horuz system completely and utterly contradicts previously established cannon by both George Lucas and the Expanded Universe, where the Rebellion remained ignorant of the Death Star and where it was, and had to formulate a plan, called Operation Skyhook, to find its location after hearing numerous rumors about such a thing. This is why W. Haden Blackman and Sean Williams' story have become so hated. It wasn't just the 8hrs of gameplay, nor the shitty script, nor the out-of-left-field romance, but also the complete and utter disregard for previously established cannon. This book/game/comic deserves the reputation of trash and should never be spoken of again. But I still have that annoying sequel to review.

Up next, Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II by Sean Williams, based on a story by W. Haden Blackman.

Book Review: Star Wars: Dark Forces: Jedi Knight SPOILERS!

On 14 October 1998, the third and final volume in the Dark Forces trilogy of novellas written by William C. Dietz was published. It was originally released by Dark Horse Comics and Boulevard. Both the hardcover and trade paperback include twenty-five full-color illustrations by Dave Dorman. This time, the fate of the Valley of the Jedi comes to a conclusion, and only Kyle Katarn can determine its fate. Synopsis: Kyle Katarn, Rebel agent and novice Jedi, has just returned from his covert operation to find the location of the Valley of the Jedi. But he knows that the evil Jerec, a dark Jedi with designs on the Empire's throne, knows where the Valley is too. Upon returning to the Alliance, and with the support of Luke Skywalker himself, Kyle offers to find the Valley and stop the oncoming Imperial invasion—and, at last, fulfill his destiny as a Jedi. Based on the popular Star Wars: DARK FORCES and Star Wars: JEDI KNIGHT interactive games, Jedi Knight is part three of a trilogy written by acclaimed author William C. Dietz (Steelheart) and illustrated by award-winning Star Wars cover artist Dave Dorman.

The novella opens on Ruusan with settler Grif Grawley being ambushed by an Imperial Probe Droid. He manages to escape and gets back to Fort Nowhere and tries to warn Mayor Byron Devo III about the Empire coming, but no one listens. Grif and his wife Carole flee into the badlands. Sariss, Yun, and Boc Aseca arrive and subdues the population after they learn that the settlers and smugglers no nothing of the Valley. During the Second Battle of Milargo, in which General Han Solo and Chewbacca lead Medpac Squadron, Luke Skywalker shows up with Kyle Katarn and Jan Ors in the Moldy Crow. After a short duel between New Hope and a damaged Star Destroyer, the Imperials surrender. On New Hope, Kyle and Luke relate to what they've learned about Ruusan and its location; Kyle proposes going to Ruusan to confront Jerec, but Mon Mothma remains convinced that Kyle will fall--she even voices this out loud--but Jan and Luke reassure Mon Mothma that her fears may not come to pass. Han volunteers to aide Kyle, but Leia Organa talks him out of it. (Possibly because Dietz realized that a Kyle-and-Han team up would be too awesome, or because Han was never in the game, but that doesn't sound as cool, does it?) The plan consists of giving Jerec's Imperials proton torpedoes that they can detonate and destroy Vengeance with. Mon Mothma, reluctantly, agrees to the plan.

On Milagro, Kyle and Jan hire rebel soldier Alfonso Luiz Obota to pretend to be the surviving ranking officer of a badly damaged Imperial Star Destroyer. The plan goes off without a hitch: Obota cons the Imperials into taking it, gets Kyle and Jan permission to land on Ruusan. In the skies, Kyle and Jan note the ruins of Fort Nowhere. The two of them happen upon Grif, Carole, Lasko, Kimber, Luther Pardy, and Portia and Kyle retells Morgan's fate and how he became a Jedi-in-training, and ended up on Ruusan. The survivors suggest Kyle meet with the bouncers. When they go to meet the bouncers, they find Imperials trying to slaughter the helpless creatures. Kyle and the survivors interfere, at the cost of every survivor except Grif. The bouncers agree to help Kyle, Jan, Grif, and WeeGee get to the Valley. Meanwhile, Yun has nightmares of killing Nij Por Ral. Maw wakes Yun up and brings him to Jerec; the Dark Jedi informs Yun that they're going to the surface of Ruusan, to the Valley of the Jedi. In the catacombs, Yun receives training from the Force ghost of Qu Rahn; Yun ends up saving the life of a stormtrooper, something Sariss notes, but doesn't understand. Yun is then sent out to track down Kyle Katarn, but having sensed Kyle in the badlands, decides to repay Kyle for sparing his life and looks the other way. Kyle, Grif, Jan, WeeGee, and Floater the bouncer sneak by and almost arrive at the Valley, when Grif sacrifices himself to kill a probe droid.

Kyle leaves Jan, WeeGee, and the bouncer behind, but Jan gets captured, the bouncer killed, and WeeGee deactivated and the Moldy Crow impounded. Kyle infiltrates the Imperial Base and receives warning from Rahn about Maw. Maw ambushes Kyle and they fight. Kyle defeats the Boltrunian Dark Jedi and Maw taunts Kyle by admitting that he was the one who placed Morgan's head on a spike in Barons Hed; Kyle gives in to his darkness and beheads Maw. Jerec applauds and reveals that he captured Jan and demands the Kyle surrender to the dark side, but Kyle refuses. Jerec uses Destruction to destroy the landing pad and Kyle barely makes it to the Moldy Crow, but he shock wave hits and Kyle crashes in the Valley floor. Kyle's knocked unconscious and witnesses the final moments of the Seventh Battle of Ruusan, becomes Jedi Master Tal who tries to voice his concern about confronting the Brotherhood of Darkness in the Valley, but Lord Hoth ignores this; becomes Sith Lord LaTor who helps Sith Lord Skere Kaan prepare the thought bomb; witnesses Lord Hoth confront Kaan and how Kaan detonated the bomb, and how it backfired and captured the 100 Jedi  volunteers of the Army of Light and 100 Sith spirits and imprisoned them in the Valley of the Jedi.

Kyle wakes up and finds Boc, Sariss, and Yun standing over him. Boc destroys Rahn's lightsaber. Sariss orders Boc to leave and tell Jerec that she killed Kyle. Yun, in a moment of pity for Kyle, blocks his mothers strike; Sariss kills her son, and, angered at Kyle, tries her best to kill him, but Kyle picked up a couple of expert sword fighting techniques from Tal and LaTor. He takes Yun's lightsaber and kills Sariss, then heads into the Valley to find Jerec. Kyle frees Jan, but Boc attacks with his two lightsabers. Kyle fights Boc and manages to kill him using a dark side technique called Spear of Midnight Black. Jerec applauds Kyle for once more giving into the dark side, but Kyle remains skeptical that the dark side has any claim on him. He duels Jerec with his new techniques and Force skills, but Jerec retreats when his hold on the Valley weakens. Kyle senses this and cocoons Jerec from the dark side. Jerec collapses as he's confronted with just the light side of the Force. Jerec reminds Kyle that he killed Morgan, but Kyle tosses Jerec's lightsaber back at the fallen Miraluka. Jerec charges Kyle, but the Jedi kills Jerec. The Valley erupts and the spirits go free. Kyle carves a memorial of Rahn and Morgan in a rock, then leaves with Jan and WeeGee.

All in all, the best damn conclusion to the Dark Forces trilogy and an epic way to set up the legend that would later become Kyle Katarn, as every game since (Jedi Knight: Mysteries of the Sith, Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast, and Jedi Knight: Jedi Academy) references the Valley of the Jedi incident. William C. Dietz created one hell of a story in this trilogy and I'm proud to have gotten the entire novella trilogy and read it several times over, amazed each time it ends.

Up next, possibly the most hated game tie-ins to ever grace the Star Wars Expanded Universe, the novelization of the eight hour video game that's generally disliked by everyone: The Force Unleashed by Sean Williams, based on a game by Haden Blackman.